I have a ton of gratitude for all that has come my way. I get to eat dinner everyday and sometimes hem and haw over which cuisine I might fancy. And I often get to have seconds if I so desire. I get to sleep in a comfortable bed every night with clean sheets under a roof that doesn’t leak in a house that is a safe place. I get fresh water freely and take hot showers daily. I work inside a building where, unless I’m really clumsy in the cafe, I won’t lose a finger or limb. My life is abundantly blessed.
Today on my 10 mile run I thought about many of the things, big and small, that I am grateful for including the ability to run freely under an open sky, at my own pace, feeling myself breathing, watching the path disappear under my feet, pushing my boundaries under my own will. It was perfect at times. I’m so lucky to have moved to a place where I have relatively easy access to a running path that will serve as my marathon training ground. I’m so lucky to have the means to afford running shoes, shorts, bras, hats, etc. And to afford to enter a marathon, with both my time and money.
All of this gratitude helped ease the pain on the run today, but make no mistake, there was pain. Enough to scare me into wondering how the hell I’m going to do almost three runs like the one I completed today with less than three months left of training time. I thought the fear and anxiety would have subsided by now, but I couldn’t have been wronger. The reality of how long this run is couldn’t be more real or scarier. I just don’t want to let anyone down.
All of it. All of the running I’ve been doing over the last several weeks is working. I ran eight miles today and didn’t die. It was an unusually cloudy morning, which made for a comfortable run. I’m still doing dumb things, like today I forgot to bring water and felt like I might crap my pants at some points, but none of that mattered. I motored on, found a drinking fountain about halfway, and got through it crap-free.
Still working on odds and ends like what to eat before long runs, how much water to drink before, during, and after each run, what gear works best, and so on. But the running is working. My weekly mileage is climbing and the San Leandro half marathon is only a few weekends away. Oh my god! I’m suddenly feeling a little nauseous.
Last week I got in two runs, but climbed the Sydney Harbour Bridge in Australia. The guides reminded me that it was about 1500 steps and about a 640 calorie workout, so I felt less guilty about missing a short, mid-week run.
See, I made it.
Australia was beautiful. It’s winter there and the days are short so my runs were limited to a treadmill. Needless to say, I’m ecstatic to be back on the trails in the bay area. My first 12 miler is planned for Saturday. Send prayers.